As I growing up, I’m starting to learn a lot about myself, and it seems to be hitting me all at once!
It can be difficult especially when you’re in a serious relationship. I love my boyfriend dearly. He means the world to me. But we’ve had our fair share of fights. And I’m talking break up kind of fights. He has broken up with me twice since we began dating.
The second time was a little more serious, but we worked things out. But ever since then, I’ve become extremely conscious about everything I do, or say because I don’t want him to break up with me again.
Sometimes it does get in the way of our relationship, especially on my part because I constantly want to know what he’s thinking or feeling and I want him to show it, so that I am reassured that he still feels the same for me. But anytime he doesn’t do the things he usually does, I panic. Then I start over thinking, and it turns into a mess that didn’t need to be a mess anyway.
I’m learning a lot about myself, my likes and dislikes, my do’s and dont’s, and the man I want in my life. He is the man I want to be with. I may only be 20, but I know I want HIM.
He has his values, his priorities right, his mind is right. I want him to look at me and feel exactly how I feel writing this. I don’t want him to look at me and think, “she’s so insecure, about herself and about our relationship”. I don’t want him to feel like he has to constantly reassure me that he won’t leave me. I want to be the apple of his eye, the woman he’d do anything for.
How can I do that?
How can I literally make him CRAVE my company the I crave his?
If there’s one thing I know damn well, its that God is the only man who should be number 1 in any woman’s life. The more time you spend with God, the healthier you feel, spiritually, emotionally, even physically! The more you crave God, the less you’ll crave the attention of man. And the less you crave their attention, the more interested they seem to become!
They’re like cat’s, chasing a rat. Once they catch the rat and kill it, they lose interest in it because there is no excitement in chasing a dead rat.
God is my top priority. I’m in such a fragile point in my life and I need a hand to hold and guide me. That hand is God’s hand. Not man.
Be happy with yourselves, be confident, smile everyday because no matter how tough the situation, there is ALWAYS a reason to smile.